“Hope” is the thing with feathers
Emily Dickinson.
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.
I believe we need to find ways to nurture hope, because hope may just be the most important gift we possess. In dark times we sometimes fear we’ve lost it forever, but it’s only sheltering underground, waiting to emerge again like green shoots in Spring.
Always remember “Hope springs eternal in the human breast”.
But even if we are typically hopeful, we can be susceptible to unhappiness and even despair. When we’ve been living with undiagnosed ADHD we may be used to having our hopes dashed, feeling we’ll never achieve our dreams and will never be happy.
So it’s even more important for us to nurture hope so that we can draw upon it when we need it most.
Losing Hope
Many years ago I went through a long period of unhappiness. I lost my ability to feel joy and wonder. But I think the worst thing of all was losing my sense of hope.
Without hope it feels as though there is no future, at least not one you want to live in. I was good at weathering emotional storms – but what was the point of a life without hope in the future?
Gradually, though, joy found its way back into my life. I began to see and appreciate beauty in the world around me. Eventually music regained its power to move me.
I promised myself I would never allow life to rob me of hope again. I would do everything in my power to nurture it.
Now hope shines brightly in my life and brings colour to everything.
Of course I’m not Pollyanna. I know there will be – have been – other difficult times. But by consciously nurturing hope I’m better equipped to come through those times.
If you’re struggling
I also know there are many people who face far worse circumstances than I’ve come through.
If you are struggling with hard times, I hope I can bring some comfort with my inevitably inadequate words. But if you feel completely hopeless and despairing, please don’t keep your pain shut away and try to battle through it alone like I did. Find professional help, or at least talk your problems through with someone you can trust.
What is Hope?
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, hope is the expectation of something desired.
In other words hope is future-oriented. It gives us reasons to live, enables us to change our lives for the better and to live more meaningful lives.
Hope motivates us to reach for goals. Without hope we don’t believe we can attain them so we may not even try. When we have no hope we feel any attempt to change our situation is pointless. In other words we feel hopeless.
So hope is a way of living our life that affects everything we do and are. It’s vital to our happiness. It helps alleviate anxiety and stress by giving us positive expectations and a greater sense of control or agency.
But it isn’t a commodity we can acquire from any external source: we have to generate hope from within ourselves. So we sometimes need a little help to do this and to find ways to increase our store.
12 Ways to Nurture Hope
What can we do to boost our store of this life-enhancing gift?
These simple strategies work for me. If any resonate with you, try them when your hope tank is running low.
- Imagining a better world and taking small steps in the right direction.
- Dreaming about how my own life could be better and making positive changes where I can.
- Looking for the good in everything and everyone rather than focusing on the negative. We find what we focus on!
- Reframing negative thoughts about my life and experiences.
- Appreciating and being grateful for what I have and the good things around me – big things (like good health, a loving family, friends, a home) and small ones (such as the sight of a flower or hearing birdsong).
- Spending time with positive people. It’s amazing what a difference it makes to our own attitude when we spend more time with people who are hopeful and optimistic rather than negative.
- Identifying and appreciating my strengths. Thinking about how I can use them more often in my life.
- Nurturing a sense of wonder and awe – seeking out beauty or experiences that inspire me.
- Smiling at people I come across in my day. They usually reciprocate and everyone’s day is brighter.
- Doing something kind for somebody. Making a difference in someone else’s life – someone we know or even a stranger – creates hope in both the giver and receiver.
- Volunteering for causes that resonate with my values. There are so many benefits which include making the world a better place and feeling more positive about ourselves and hopeful for the future.
- Laughing! It makes us feel much more optimistic and hopeful – and since laughter is contagious, other people benefit too.
By taking small positive steps like these we can feel more hopeful. And as a result, we will experience more happiness in our lives.
In fact it’s a virtuous circle. The more hopeful we are, the happier we feel. And the happier we feel, the more hopeful we are.
For more ideas on feeling good, take a look at my post Put Yourself First
Final thoughts on nurturing hope
If hope feels out of your reach in the present moment, please believe that change is possible. Try some of these strategies anyway and have faith that one day you will feel better and more hopeful. And please, please get professional help if you can’t escape from a dark place.
And finally, if you’ve found other ways of nurturing hope, why not share them with us by leaving a comment?
